Friday, March 25, 2011

Key Word: Moderation

 As a mother, I am very very obsessed with my child's growth and development. I obsess over every single detail of her tiny little being. I read every parenting book I could lay my hands on and googled up almost all the information I needed answers to. I could even jot down and write a book entitled, "Confessions of a First-Time Mom" if I wanted to. Letting all the knowledge seep into my brain like a sponge so that I can compare my child to what others may have called the 'perfect child'. Never did I realise that I was digging a hole so deep that could have landed me in Obsession Land. Vile and acidic these websites. The husband had told me to 'take it easy'... take it in stride, but I kept on being a worry wart. When Aaliyah wasn't drinking enough milk (according to the guidelines I read about on the can, in websites and in books), I started to get paranoid. A lot of questions raced through my mind. Was she drinking enough? Should I see the doctor? Should I change bottle? Should I change teat? Should I change formula brand? What if it was colic? What if it was trush? Was her weight in the just nice percentile? Why are other babies her age so chubby? Is there phlegm in her throat? Is something bothering her? 101 questions popped up in my brain in a split second. As if that wasn't enough, I searched through websites. I googled, I yahooed, I went to forums, I asked on Facebook and Tweeter. In fact, I used up every immunity I had just to figure out and solve the problem. A parent's job is, after all, to problem solve a child's needs. (Yes, this too, I read somewhere.)

The realisation struck me. It was information overload. The magazine says this, the book says that, the 'Mummyanswers101' handle in the Mummy forum says another. My mind was so overloaded that my hair started falling as if the roots cannot take the poisonous gibberish. Literally. Even the teachers in her school told me that she had difficulty finishing up her milk. To ease my mind, I finally brought her to a paediatrician nearby which, yes, I googled up. The moment we brought Aaliyah into the Dr's room. "So what's wrong with her? I see here everything's just fine. She's perfect. Her weight is of normal range, 50th percentile, in fact. She doesn't have a fever, no flu. Nothing. What's the worry about?" My heart sank into oblivion. Is this Dr for real? I told her that Aaliyah wasn't drinking enough milk according to the guidelines shown on the milk can or on websites or on various charts that I have researched. She gave me one sniggering head-to-toe look and said, "You mothers ah... So Obsessed about numbers and how many ounces and millilitres. Your baby knows best! Your baby will know when she wants to drink, when she's hungry and when she's full. Don't need to be so obsessed about numbers. If you compare a huge 2m European Mummy and you, an Asian mummy who is small built, your babies will of course appear different. Those are just guidelines. Forget it! You are healthy, most importantly, your baby is healthy, what's there to worry about?" The Doctor gave me a sound advice that made me feel like she hit my head onto a brick wall. I guess even Amy Chua the Tiger Mummy would have done that. I concurred. I am a worry freak.

From then onwards, I decided to stay away from poison. From information overload that could cloud my mind like a wild hurricane. And I needed to heed the husband's advice to...... take it easy.

Albeit all that, I still visit forums once in a while to cure my obsession. For example, if I hadn't visited one, I wouldn't have known that all this while, I have given Aaliyah the wrong position of the NUK bottle teat. I faced the anti-colic hole downwards, when it was supposed to be upwards! I tried feeding her milk with the hole facing upwards and walahhhhhh.... she gobbled up her milk in 15 mins as compared to 45 mins. So you see, there is some good to doing researching too. (The ego hasn't left the building.) I needed to prove my point. =P

Thus, Key Word: Moderation.


On another note, here's a video showing Aaliyah's actions at her PlayGym! She's doing something in between unoccupied play and solitary play. @3mths3weeks.

Honing her gross motor skills, eye-hand coordination and eye-feet coordination. Maybe even hand feet coordination. Haha! Her favourite mobiles are the giraffe and the hippopotamus. She's still flailing her hands around. Have fun Aaliyah! Don't worry about being developmentally ready at this age. Just... have... fun!

Great Job Aaliyah!!!!!!! Concentration skills and being a little too ambitious at times. Hahaha! Love you love you love you!!

Last but not least......


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